Today marks 3 months since Mark’s passing
It is interesting to look back at the last three months.
To look at my kids emotions, my emotions, and our family’s emotions.
- Month 1 – Daily tears, sensitivity towards one another, somewhat of a quiet unspoken family teamwork of such going on.
- Month 2 – Maybe reality setting in a little? Bickering amongst siblings becoming more frequent. I am attempting to stay calm and let them let it out as maybe this is their way of letting out their grief.
- Month 3 – Good days and bad days. Anger seems to jump from one kid to the next and you don’t know which day whose space you are going to be walking on eggshells with.
This is behind-the-scenes real talk. My role has changed as their mom.
My time for them has now been thinned out during this season. I don’t tend to them and their needs like I could before.
I cry I pray, I feel like a failure.
This is where the below picture of me and my girlfriends comes into play.
Out of the blue, girls who I have not seen in 18 years
reached out to me asking if I would like to rally and have some “Girl Time”.
I barely got done reading the text message and was looking at a mutual spot for us all to connect as one was from Seattle, WA, one from Michigan, and one from Vermont.
The timing could NOT have been more
perfect.
Tears of joy and thankfulness are running down my cheeks as I write this.
As we all took turns sharing about our lives for the past 18 years, there was healing amongst the pain.
” SOMETIMES, WE JUST WANT TO KNOW THAT WE ARE NOT ALONE”
The entire weekend as we ate, shopped, danced, played bean bag toss, and sat around a fire pit…
We laughed, we cried, we hugged, we listened, we encouraged, we just were… in the moment of each other.
We LOVED.
Mark Hoverson used to say that your closest friends will be those that you have prayed together with, worked with and played together with.
Us 4 girls have done all of that together.
And even though it had been 18 years since we had seen each other, I couldn’t have felt closer and felt more loved.
Deborah Beer, Corrie Hodge and Renee Miles…
I LOVE YOU.
THANK YOU for letting me know that I am not alone.
I have gained a renewed strength in knowing that I am in a season and with all seasons, a new season will come.
A brighter season.
